Thursday, July 29, 2010

Sad news.....

This is not the post I had originally planned.  But as we all know God sometimes has other plans for us.  It is very hard to type this, write this  and even say the words, but I have to vent (of sorts) and I felt like this was a good place to start.  It hurts very much to tell people that my Mom, by best friend, passed away recently. Heavy Sigh.  Those that have followed along (Thank you for being patient and understanding for my absence!) might remember that Mom meant so much to me and we tried to do almost everything together. Man, she is missed sooooooo MUCH!!!  I love you Mom!!

She had been diagnosed with Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) and emphysema several years ago and recently she was admitted to the hospital because she was having a hard time breathing.  Her heart and lungs were not playing nice together and the medicines were not helping.  The doctors recommended hospice care.  That was hard to hear.  This was unexpected.  We thought she was doing pretty good, all things considered.  She recently had appointments with her doctors and things were good.  Apparently God and Mom had other plans.  Looking back, I know now that she was tired of struggling to breathe.

She would always talk about how she was looking forward to another grandbaby (this would be her 11th grandchild) and was so excited we were adopting from Taiwan. She wouldn't wait to see a picture, just like the rest of us are!! (Keep your fingers crossed)  She wanted to travel with me to Taiwan like she did when Emily came home from China. Now she can still travel with me as my guardian angel.

My brothers and their families have all gone home (they live in GA & FL) and our Home Hotel, is oddly quiet.  I had ten people here, so cleaning and feeding them kept me busy.  But now I have other things to keep me busy, because my dining room table that I call my staging  area is now covered with flowers, cards and so many memories of all Mom, her life, her kids, grandkids, and great grandkids, three of those too!  I can't bring my self to put anything away and since we don't have any school projects going on, what's the rush, right? She trusted me with all her last thoughts and wishes.  So much love and support sitting here and occasionally I stop and re-read them with the tissue box in my hand.  I will do my best to make her proud.

On a happier note, I recently found out that we have moved up on the list and are a bit closer now, so that was  wonderful to hear.  I was able to tell Mom about it, because we found out about a week before she went into the hospital.  I often wonder if it wasn't a tidbit of news she may have been waiting to hear, knowing she could pass in peace then........   I try to think that she will have a hand in sending us the perfect little baby for our family, a blessing sent right from Heaven!

I am sorry that I haven't stopped by to visit my favorite families in blog world, but I will catch up soon.  Plus I have a lot of happenings I'd like to share from our home.  Thanks for stopping by and listening.  It felt good to "talk" about it.  Please keep her wish going with lots of prayers for a blessing from Heaven.    
I'm going to get more tissues!   :-)